Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Trip Report: PajamaJeans - It All Comes Out in the Wash

So I finally washed the things.  This one's short, but the next post is the one the public (all four of you) is itching for anyway, so I'll be briefer than normal:

They bleed color just like a normal pair of dark blue-wash jeans, so definitely wash ALONE the first time.

I ignored the washing instructions other than that, because I ordered them a size bigger than usual because *a-hem* internet.  Delicate cycle, HOT water, followed by a super-high cotton setting to shrink the fuck out of them, which I suppose I could also write off as a part of the experiment to test the shrinkage level, but I just thought of that and it hadn't even crossed my mind at the time so why lie?  The t-shirt was thrown into a regular cold wash, and into the dryer, because I'm very very very impatient, and I don't see why a pair of novelty pajamas/convenience sweats should be air-dried flat when it takes away part of the, oh I don't know, CONVENIENCE.

The shrinkage isn't so much as I thought, which is a good thing as far as accidentally shrinking them, however actually TRYING to shrink them because you're a douchebag who ordered them too big it's not so good.

Actually, that's about it.  It's a laundry post.

Ah, celebrity blogger I am not.

Tomorrow, the final writeup!  I wear PajamaJeans ALL DAY and tell you about it!  Excitement!

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Trip Report: PajamaJeans - Initials

My friends make me the guinea pig a lot, because I'm willing to do a bunch of random off-the-wall stupid things, most of them food and internet-related.  "TSatisdee, go eat a Double-Down at KFC and tell me about it."  "TSatisdee, attempt something at fancyfastfood.com and achieve greatness."  "TSatisdee, you should go buy this crap at whateverwebsite.com and tell me all about it."
And I'll totally do it too, because I'm the kinda person that will also click a link despite the fact that it says www.bestialboffers.com....just to see.  I'm like that.
So when PajamaJeans went viral on a shit ton of websites, I had to look.  I also had to buy.  And I also promised my friends that I'd post a detailed report about these awesome-looking things, because they are, tentatively, something that they would ALL buy.  So I've guinea-pigged myself out, for 47.80, for the welfare of the INTERNET.
I have also just noticed a lot of commas and hyphens up there.  Ish.
So let's start with the initial impressions and ordering process involved with these things, i.e. the boring part:

The website itself, PajamaJeans.com , has changed since I ordered from it.  Upon initially discovering this, the website took you straight to a standard As-Seen-On-TV/straight from the interwebz purchasing site.  A video of the product, a price in an explosion shape, and a pull down menu for your size.  I don't have the paperwork in front of me, but if I remember correctly it was 34.95 for a pair of pajamajeans, with a free heather-gray t-shirt in the same size, not including shipping and handling.  While the price was slightly stifling, I wanted a pair badly and the internet was depending on my internet impulse-shopping to follow through.  So I threw the money at it, praying it would stick, and explained to my husband that not only are pajamajeans a novel, awesome and potentially world-changing product, I had people depending on me.  I have such a loving husband.
However, I just checked the website that the above link will take you to, and something amazingly corporate has happened.  Pajamajeans.com now takes you to pajamagram, one of those ridiculously priced "I forgot a Mother's Day/Anniversary/Sorry I cheated gift and can't think of anything else" sites that packages a cutesy pj set in a fancy box for an outrageous amount of dough.  And, the price has gone up from the slightly-ouchtastic 34.95 to a knee-blowingly OW 59.95 up to size 14 and an OMG WTF BBQ 64.95 for 1X to 3X sizes.  At these new prices, yall would have been out of LUCK.
With that out of the way, we'll go back to my personal experience with the original website and purchase.
Fucking douchebag pajamagrams.

Price-wise, 34.95 with shipping and whatnot, even with a FREE gray t-shirt, came to 47.80 (or possibly .90).  Time will tell if the first-quoted price is worth it.  We'll see in a day or two.
Shipping:  Oy.  This was a typical ASOTV agreement, that would see my pajamajeans shipped in FIVE TO SEVEN WEEKS.  Dammit.  As I ordered mine on April 2, 2010 and received them April  29, that's not that bad.  However, the main issue I had was that usually internet vendors will tell you via e-mail when there is an issue with stock, or when your item ships, and I received neither.  These things sold like hotcakes, and if I hadn't subscribed to their FaceBook profile I never would have known that they were backlogged like a mofo and that it could possibly have taken longer than normal.  I also never recieved a shipping receipt, so it was kinda like Christmas when they showed up out of nowhere.  However, I received them in a slightly-timely manner, so no major complaints.

First reaction: HOLY SHIT MOTHERFUCKING PAJAMAJEANS WOOT.  Opening the package, my inner geek took over before my inner consumer could critique, so I immediately dropped trou in my living room and put them on, tag and all.
I am 5 foot 3 inches.  I get that I'm short, and also a size 18.  When you are a size 18, most women's clothing manufacturers figure that you're at LEAST 5'4", and unless I can find it in a petite size it's going to be long.  The pajamajeans were long, and I accept that.  There are ridiculously soft, and they do indeed have contrast stitching just like real denim jeans.  They also have back pockets, and front pockets, and rivets-like thingies, so they do resemble the real deal.  But OMG how do they not have belt loops?  Why would you NOT include belt loops?  The waistband isn't gathered with elastic like the typical Hanes sweatpants you pick up at WalMart, so there is a LOT of room at the top, even with my sizable gut.

DISCLAIMER: When ordering things online, you never can tell about the size ratio, so whilst I am a solid 18, I ordered a 20-22 in case they ran small.  After all, on the commercials all the pajamajean wearing models were 4 or 6 at the most.  Because, you know, fat girls wearing sweats do NOT sell sweats, but skinny girls wearing sweats DO.  I plan on washing them in a hot water cycle to shrink them down, but that brings up another point I'm about to discuss.

DISAPPOINTMENT:  You can't put them in the dryer.  The tag clearly beseeches the new owner to wash their new pajamajeans before wearing them, and OMG please wash them ALONE, and DRY FLAT.  This irks me, because what's the point of buying these convenience sweats/jeans for the CONVENIENCE if you have to jump hoops to wash them?  Donkulous.

So there''s the initials for my PajamaJeans.  Later today I will wash them, and that trip report will also be fairly boring, but not nearly as long as this one.  Stay tuned!

Thursday, April 29, 2010

I Believe (A Geeky Housewife's Manifesto)

I believe that Doctor Who is the best sci-fi show in the history of the world, ever. 
I believe that every movie Brendan Fraser has been in, regardless of the Oscar-worthiness, has been awesome and that he has acted his damn heart out and is awesome. 
I believe that the 80's was the best decade for music, and that Bubba-willing a revival of awesome decadent pop-rocky music will happen in the next ten years with Lady Gaga leading the charge and paving the way for more awesome. 
I believe that celebrities that bitch about the whole world watching their every move should realize that they've made themselves a publicly traded commodity and that they brought it on themselves. 
I also believe, however, that there are some things that we should really leave them alone about (I'm looking at you, Perez, you nosy pendejo). 
I believe that friends are friends forever, but that friendships should be two-sided exchanges of lives and ideals, and NOT HARD WORK.  If I've gotta stress about pissing you off, man you are the FUCK out of my life. 
I believe that setting my own standards of not dealing with stupidity based on my own skewed morals has made me somewhat of an asshole and loner, but that I don't have to deal with TOO much drama and I like that. 
I believe that I have too many hobbies, and that I don't have time to do half of them, but also that I will one day be able to do it and do it awesomely. 
I believe that the word awesome is not used remotely enough during a normal conversation.  Also, I believe that more people should use the words FAIL and WIN, despite what the internet thinks. 
I believe that my kid can't have enough bruises, bumps, scrapes, and cat scratches from learning her own limitations without too much of my intervention. 
I believe that irresponsible pet owners should have their animals shot or taken from them, and that they then should be told EXACTLY why they were douchebags. 
I believe that Twilight is some serious shit that sucks, and that Buffy needs a revival.
I'm fairly sure that I can't decide who's the hotter Scotsman: John Barrowman or David Tennant, even though Barrowman is super-duper gay and I love him for that. 
I believe that if you can't laugh at yourself and others, and they can't laugh back, then it's not worth having those jerks around. 
I believe that people are WAY too uptight about internet culture, especially the use of the word Faggot, and that everyone should spend some quiet lurk time in the darkest corners of the internet to just KNOW THAT IT'S THERE. 
I believe that the spiders are seriously out to get me.
I believe that food is not just about cramming shit into your mouth to survive, but that it's about culture and tradition and history. 
I believe that everyone should try eating a pig nose to tail, or at least try killing one yourself, to know where your sustenance comes from.
I believe that if you can give freely of yourself unto others, you totally should, including presents.  I LOVE giving presents. 
I believe that I am far craftier and skilled than I really am. 
I believe that my husband loves me, no matter how much fatter I've gotten over seven years.
I believe that my kid may be a genius, if only she'd quit farting on the cats and mixing ketchup in her milk. 
I believe that bad movies can sometimes be better than good movies if you need something to watch, like Repo The Genetic Opera is so much more full of win than that fucking Avatar movie that I refuse to watch.
I believe that if my family is in clean clothes, fed 3 times a day with some healthy stuff, and not wallowing in their own nasty cloud of personal filth because of that wonderful invention the shower, then goddamn you douchehogs I AM doing my job.
I believe that the eternal war between housewives and working mothers is bullshit, and that anyone who perpetrates a difference is an asshole who is more than likely someone who doesn't have kids.
I believe everyone needs a boo-boo blanky to make themselves feel better after a rough day.
I believe that milk chocolate is nasty.  Sorry.
I believe that the internet is a wonderful thing, a tool for the age, and also a burden for idiots who put too much out there and then complain OMG MAH PRIVACY when some channer with too much time on their hands goes after them.  I am guilty as well as over-sharing on the webz, but I am trying to remedy that after much experience and test-subjecting.
I believe that there is nothing cuter than a baby hedgehog.  Possibly a baby hippo.
I believe that my collection of goofy off-the-wall WTF movies is fabulous.  Bubble Boy is an under-rated comedy classic.
I believe that this blog will one day be updated on a regular basis.